Requiem

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Gracious Messenger

Be a Gracious Messenger

 

To all the fair souls who have passed in peace, yet far too soon,

May you rest in the refuge of eternal home.

In the space of your sorrowful absence, righteous shadows shall arise.

To the injured and distraught, may justice ease the anguish.

So we, who are still here, may become wise and profoundly aware,

To awaken each morning with resolve to shed anger, release resentment,

and halt the hatred.

We will shine our internal light stronger than the debilitating darkness.

We will not shrink in fear, but grow in courage.

We will gather to create a force of goodwill for the sake of safety, and above all,

For the enduring sanctity of blessed life.

In memory of stolen and shattered lives, if you have something good to say, speak up.

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Spring Forth

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Green Boat

Winter has released its grip. The pond is melting and so is the puddle in my brain.

Sometimes in the dark winter months, you can’t think of anything except the daily routine. You flop out of bed, take a shower, brush your teeth, go to work, talk to the same people about the same things and the next day it’s pretty much the same . . .

Your favorite TV shows barely break up the monotony. And then in the middle of nothing, something changes. The spirit inside you notices the light lingering beyond the usual dusk. And then, literally, the evening birds begin to sing. And once that happens, the frogs open their soggy eyes.

You smile like you mean it and everyone thinks you have a secret. You do. The mystery of a story so far untold, your story . . . the rest of your story, begins to open up. You are not frozen, stagnant, sad or depressed. You are emerging from a self-imposed cocoon.

The recurrence of spring is like the spontaneous joy of a child who feels well every day in the awareness of her own nature.

Beneath the ice of the mind and through the collection of winter debris, a tadpole of truth effortlessly treads water. Seasons come around again. Dormant dreams show seeds of manifestation. The arrival of spring opens up like a sigh of a second chance and offers the freedom of a fresh start.

If you have a boat, then I have a pond upon which you can float.

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Holiday Spirit

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Silent Light

 

At this time of year, in spite of confusing and uncertain times, there is a feeling of confidence in the air.

It is an innocent and childlike acceptance of humanity. You can feel it emanating from the earth and traveling through the crisp air.

The holiday season creates conflicting emotions for many of us. Some feel a sense of isolation and a lack of enthusiasm for the holidays that seem to come around quicker every year.

Now, more than ever, I remind myself how important it is to go to the frog pond to sit with Sog and wait for his wisdom to seep into my soul.

Give yourself the gift of a silent moment in the Christmas tree lot, or while driving through a neighborhood bright with holiday lights. A few peaceful, deep breaths in a warm shower can relax your tense muscles and restore harmony to your thoughts.
None of us has to be completely absorbed and overwhelmed by the holiday hype.

Remember, in the madness of the crowd, in the expectations real or imagined, it is our inner spirit that deserves the gift of inner peace.

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Lost and Found

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On the path

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.

— Rumi

 

When I was a child, I liked to wander away from my family. At parks, zoos, the mall and at the boat show in New York City, I watched my parents and siblings walk away without me.

They were unaware of my desire to become lost.

I took advantage of my free time by exploring things the others weren’t interested in. Looking at stuff they had promised we could see later; but I knew better. Later is a made up place. Later never happens in real time or real life. For me, later became now.

It still does. Sometimes you have to take a few steps back to remove yourself from the crowd. As you step back, you become almost invisible, blendable. It’s easy to slip away then, and when the others notice something missing, they have to think for a minute. What happened? Where was I looking when she slipped away?

I was only four when I decided to let go. I could tell even then that I had to discover for myself what the world had to offer. No one was going to hand me the information that I wanted. I remember my father saying, if anyone gets lost meet by the escalator. So why were they so shocked when an hour later I showed up at that escalator? It’s easy to do what you are told as long as you get to do what you want in the meantime.

It’s good to know how to get out of the way. Out of your own way and out of others’ way. Begin by trusting. Understand that if you let go you will not fall. If we let go and follow the path that lures us, if we look back just once, to remind ourselves of the path we choose not to take, we can walk confidently forward.

For a split second – every chance you get – relax into your soul, your solo self. When you can do that, then it doesn’t matter if you are lost. You can always find your way home.

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Needs

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Pond path

I hadn’t been to the frog pond for weeks. This evening after a long day at work, I realized I was free to go and visit Sog. It had been so long, I wondered if he would remember me,  and would I recognize him.

The path last remembered as lush, and muddy, now stretched like a dry yawn of cracked white earth in the irritating angle of four o’clock sun. Disheartened I slowed my pace. The pond could be dried up for all I knew. I heard the frogs before I saw them. Their rhythmic melody encouraged me to call out, Hello.

A second of silence, then jubilant, I dare say, frog voices responded to me. Several frogs emerged from the murky and near stagnant pond. They gazed at me through silky slimed eyes. I stood on the bank looking around and pretending that I wasn’t seeking Sog.

I will not think of the worst. I won’t panic and wonder how I will manage to walk home without spotting him. I distracted myself by collecting pebbles and tossing them into the pond to create a ripple.

The gentle breeze stirred itself into gusty dust and swirled my hair around my head and over my eyes. I closed my eyes only to open them when the gritty ground swirled in a wave across my face.

After lots of blinking and eye rubbing, I leaned over the pond and splashed some water on my T-shirt to wipe my eyes. If it was good enough for frogs, it was good enough for me. By the time I could see again, Sog squatted only a few feet away at the edge of the pond. He turned his eyeballs around and blinked as if he was showing me the proper way to clean dirt from your eyes.

And as I watched him watching me, I realized that this simple creature had wisdom beyond mine. Maybe they all do, the creatures of the earth. There were no cell phones ringing at the frog pond. . . nobody croaking that they couldn’t log on to the internet or that their job sucked. No muddy frog cars parked along the bank or anyone rushing across lily pads to get to the bank and make a deposit, or grab cash from the ATM, so they could buy dinner and drinks, and drown their sorrows and fears.

For all of our resources and inventiveness, our busy lives and complicated relationships, are we doing what we want, finding what we need? It all comes down to the same thing. We need to eat. That’s what started it all.

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Freedom

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Happy 4th of July

Happy Birthday America!

The definition of Freedom: The power to act or think or speak without externally  imposed restraints.

I want to share an excerpt from the Declaration of Independence. Think about that. I declare my independence . . .

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. —”

May God shine his light upon you and the ones you love.

In Reverence

 

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Rest Easy

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Shadow Trees

We can all rest easy. The voices in our heads don’t always come from ourselves.

They come from all around us. It’s not necessary to know exactly where the swirling words come from.  All we need to know is that when the voice doesn’t sit right, it’s time to let it go.

These days we are diligent in our resistance to adversity. We are stalwart in our allegiance to survival. And we are tired.

If you look into the eyes of your loved ones and your co-workers, can you see what they are seeing?

Can you feel what they are feeling?

Is there hiding?

How about seeking?

We all yearn for something because it is the human thing to do.

Yearning is learning, earning, and ultimately thriving.

We need a reason to allow our eyes to open in the morning. And once awake, we need a reason to plant our feet on the floor. When you do plant your feet on the earth of a new day, give yourself a smile, step forward and carry on. One step at a time have a look around as if it’s your first day here.

Like starting a new job with conscientious attention, give yourself a chance.

We can all show reverence to the people we encounter along–or in–our way.

We are here now. Some of us are sad and lonely. Some of us are angry. Some of us are confused. All of us matter.

Some voices are louder than others. Everyone is capable of hearing and helping each other.

I slipped off a cliff into the churning ocean. Immediately, the surge slapped me against the lava rocks. Salt water gushed over my head, down my throat, into my ears and stung my eyes.

I have a deep sense of loss. Yet, I carry on.

We are our own shadows. We are dark, and we are light.

 

 
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Honesty

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“I’m a very honest guy. I like to guide my tables honestly” -Sid from Tinto

We met this lovely and enthusiastic waiter at the exquisite restaurant Tinto in Palm Springs.

www.ocregister.com/articles/garces-341253-palm-tinto.html

His sincerity got me thinking about self motivation and truth.

The truth is.

It is what you say to yourself everyday.

If you look in the mirror and say I look terrible, then you do. Once decided that you look like less, you feel like less. And in this case less is not more. The truth is, once you settle for less, you end up with less than what you settled for. Don’t do that. Decide to feel good. Allow it. Tell yourself that you look good and that you feel well.

That’s where the truth comes in. When you practice feeling well, opportunities arrive. With these opportunities come choices. The first choice can feel a little shaky. That’s a good sign and when your first choice is made, relief follows. The choice can be anything from what you want for dinner, to whether you will go for a walk, or stay home.

Try something different and see how it makes you feel. Give yourself some time to get used to your new choice. And when you do that every day, it will feel like your birthday.

Happy Birthday!

 

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Music

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Some time ago, my son made music CD’s for me. He chose music that he liked and knew I would like too.  Well, of course, what else would he do.

He wrote on the CD; Listen often. On another one he wrote; listen to the music.

And after  that he would call me and say. “Suzi, are you listening to the music?”

Time went on and that became the mantra. “Are you listening to the music?”

Well, if you haven’t asked yourself yet. Are you listening to the music?

Listen.

Do you hear any music? If not, get some music turned on right away. The music is the story of your life, unfolding everyday in your mind. And your soul. The music you listen to today defines the current of moments in your life now.  Don’t miss it.

Turn up the radio in your car. Tell your big mean boss that you need a radio so you can smile while you work at your desk. You can sing along, you can hum, and you can make memories from the words that come across the radio waves just for you sitting there listening . . .

Music is mystical, a sacred chant. It alleviates stress and enables harmony. Like a bowl of soup for a searching soul, music warms, soothes, and calms us internally.

Other times, the music ignites memories, passion, joy and reverence.

There is everything right there in the talent of a musician, presented for you to feel one way, and then another. To remember why we live, why we walk, why we carry on day after day.

Hear the music. Feel the music. Be the music.

There is music in the trees, in the water, in the wind, in your hair, from the birds, the bugs, behind your eyes.

There is music in silence.

There is music in words impossible to speak.

“I must hear music where I walk. Always and forever.

That is why I have left all friends who talk

and have taken with me only those who understand.”

—RS 1974

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Thoughts on the Writer’s Conference

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Last weekend I spoke at the For the Love of Writing Conference in Sherwood Park, Edmonton, Alberta.

The title of my presentation was Memoir Writing: Portraying Your Truth.

It was a whirlwind weekend. Our dinner the first evening, included Linda J. Pedley, Mandy Eve Barnett, and Joe McKnight. Laughter prevailed with inspiring ideas for books. Potential cover designs were discussed.

One evening, Mandy Barnett and I heard frogs calling from the field of intermittent ponds across the street from our hotel. The ponds appeared and disappeared depending on the rainfall or sunshine of the hour.

We didn’t have time to visit the pond and actually see the frogs but they sang out all the same in harmony with the enthusiastic energy generated by the conference and the super moon.

My friend Donna Mansell introduced me to her lovely daughter, Vanessa. Check out her blog at trueahavah.blogspot.com

The final evening found several of us enjoying wine and dinner at Vicki’s Restaurant at the Strathcona County Library. We were honored with the company of, Angi from Angi’s Wholistic Sancturay.

The overall feeling of the conference was that of affinity, ambition, kinship, inspiration and potential.

I enjoyed seeing the Canada Goose at home in Canada. Why do some leave I wondered as I flew south feeling happy and sad at the same time. Not every Canada Goose lives in Canada. Maybe, like me, they wonder; should I stay or should I go?

 

Mandy, Angi and Suzanne

All I can say is, every chance you get, go with the flow. Your life awaits you.

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